My son, who is eight, has been changing in interesting ways lately. He’s beginning to see the world outside of himself. He’s learning that other people have a range of desires just like he does, and through that, he’s been doing a bit of peeking into my world, learning a little about what makes me tick, what I’m trying to do, and what a few of my goals are.
It didn’t take too long before we got onto my novel.
He asked why I don’t spend a lot of time writing. I told him that since getting my new job, (day shift, weekends off, holidays off, etc) my focus now is on family and friends. The conversation bounced around a little. Most of his side was him being supportive and wanting me to finish my book, and I eventually told him that the problem I have is a good one. It’s the problem of not having enough time to spread over all of the things I care about. I have more opportunity, family and friends than I have time for. Combined with work and saving time for myself, it means my writing has been put on pause until it bubbles back to the surface.
He seemed to understand, but he pressed on. He hung onto the idea that I should still be writing even if there isn’t much time to do it. With that, I conceded that I could be writing more often, but that my biggest hurdle is my own fear about writing in public instead of private. I like my surroundings to be quiet and undisturbed. I like to have a block of time to work with. But the reality is I could work in twenty minute blocks here and there if I focused on it. What’s really holding me back is my own fear, not the actual difficulty of writing with others around. The belief that it will be difficult is more powerful than the actual difficulty itself.
That, and a smidgen of laziness.
He said I should keep trying anyway because he thinks it’d be pretty neat if I finished my book. I asked if part of that belief came from my promise to buy myself the Lego Death Star as reward for completing it, and he immediately agreed and went onto an eager tangent about how cool it would be to have that, as well as many other Lego sets we don’t have.
And so, this last Friday, I found myself with a bit of time. I worked on another Chapter, mostly reading and some editing, and I’m happy to say it went really well. I’m in no hurry to post anything, but actual progress was made. New words were written. All good things.
All from a little nudge by an eight year old excited to see his dad finish a book and finally buy a Lego Death Star. Works for me.